Small Towns Podcast
Small Towns Podcast
E21: Things we learned the hard way.
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Welcome millions upon millions, perhaps billions, of faithful podcast listeners. We are your hosts, Jason Kimber and Dave Simmons. We'll bring you along with us as we share life stories from our experiences living in small towns, or in Jason's case, an unincorporated community. That's true. Along with genius suggestions for solving the world's problems and a whole lot of laughs.
SPEAKER_01This is the Small Towns Podcast. Hey Dave, how's it going? I'm doing great. Jason, how are you? Well, I'm doing great. You look great. I feel pretty good. Speaking of, have you had some of our wonderful listeners? They're very astute. Yes. They remind me of things that maybe you and I say, maybe too much. Oh, for sure. I've noticed in pretty much every episode I say, Well, you look great. But that's what I say that to everybody. You do say that to everybody.
SPEAKER_00People feel good about themselves. And I feel better when you say it. And I actually think that that we should continue to say that. It's almost turned into a little bit of um back and forth shtick, if you will. I like it.
SPEAKER_01Well, when you ever if anyone ever says something maybe that they're uncomfortable about about their own self, their own bot, I just feel like it's a nice thing to say, well, you look great. You look great.
SPEAKER_00Along those same lines, so we gotta keep that going. Okay. You look great. Thank you. Feel great. Feel good. But one phrase that uh, and I'm somewhat known for this, I'll I'll latch onto a phrase, and I'm like a dog with a bone. You're just gonna say, like, I'll just use that and I'll use that. And even listening back to some of these, and I've had a few people comment, if they hear the phrase from me, if you will. You're the if you will guy. I'm the if you will, uh, if you will. Do you even know you're saying it? Do you even know you're saying it? I'm trying to be more aware of it. So I want to say the last couple of episodes, maybe I've said it less, although I did say it. Uh I lose track of the times. But do you want me to help you? Yeah. I mean like if you say, if you will.
SPEAKER_01I'll no, I'll just say, oh, I will.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, because like what kind of question? That's not even that's like a rhetorical question. Like, yeah, hey, fellow podcast listeners, if you will. Oh what? Oh, I will. You bet I will.
unknownOh.
SPEAKER_01So yeah, that'll that'll be our my little help for you. If you don't mind.
SPEAKER_00I would I would take it. I think sometimes we've talked about this before, but it seems like if we brought this up, you had a great idea for another podcast. And I think the title, I don't want to take this thunder away from you. Do you remember the title? No. You know what your problem is?
SPEAKER_01I wanted to start a business, a consulting business. Yeah, that's right. Called You Do You Know What Your Problem Is? Because you I've look, I've learned some things the hard way in my life. And I'd like to not have to look the thing is, is when you're young, you have an excuse for it. Like one time I thought, well, I could use I could use a tan. And I was a teenager, I don't even know how old I was. My guess is 14, something. So I thought, well, I'm gonna go and lay on our trampoline and try to tan up a little bit.
SPEAKER_00I fell asleep. Did you, but I I want to hear the end of what happened when you woke up. But before we get to young Dave Awakening, yeah, had you lathered up with some what was that like that? It had like a suntan lotion, it had like a like a palm tree on it. Some uh I don't know.
SPEAKER_01I can't imagine I was that smart. No, well, I mean, I don't think that's good. I think that tanning basted you, yeah.
SPEAKER_00It's like I'll take my Dave medium rare. Thanks so much.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, well, I was crispy.
SPEAKER_00I was extra crispy that day.
SPEAKER_01You fell asleep on the tramp. Yeah. Oh, but you know what? As kids, and I remember it hurting, and I'm a fair-skinned fella. You are, buddy, you are. And I love that because I love it. Yeah. And and the little bald spot up there now, you you know you're getting old when you gotta put sunscreen on your head. I know. But but as a kid, you know, you learn those lessons. But as a grown man, I've had some things happen in my life. I'm like, sure wish I would have known a little better before now that I shouldn't say that. Try me to give you a case in point.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, please do, because this is definitely getting uh the creative juices flow into my own mind. Because I think, and I'm sure our listeners will agree, we have all done things, whether we were very young or whether it was yesterday.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. They look back on and say that was not the but hopefully we can laugh at ourselves and you have people around you. You surround yourself with people that can forgive you when you do dumb stuff. And I have a wonderful wife. You, she's one of the best. She is one of the best. I've said it for years. I've married up. I don't know how I have how it happened, but I have a wonderful wife. And I'm gonna give you a couple cases and points here. Of things that you learned the heart, right? Yeah, and they're terrible, Jason. I mean, our listeners are gonna be just cringing the whole time, like, no, don't say it. Don't you didn't say that. Okay, so we are, I think it was after our second child. No, I want to say our first. It hadn't been our first because so back then they would wheel the the mother who just had this baby, they for whatever reason put her in a for purposefully capable of walking at that time, but they put her in a wheelchair. I know, but it's like let's back up. We don't want to learn anything more the hard way. No, I've learned plenty of the hard way. Anyways, they have her in a wheelchair and we're with they're wheeling her out. Okay, we're going out of the hospital. We're literally just leaving the hospital. And I, as uh any husband would do, was praising her about how wonderful she is and how great she did and the whole thing, you know. I'm like, you did you were amazing. Because it's a pretty amazing thing. Oh, for sure. They don't call it the miracle of birth for no reason. No, it was the miracle of birth of birth. So so we're we're coming out of the hospital, and I said, Hey, you were amazing. You were that was unbelievable. And she said, Thanks. I just now I just have this extra 40 pounds to lose. So in my head, I'm like, well, of course.
SPEAKER_00I mean, you just had a baby. Yeah, fair enough. Like, because you don't they they gain our sweetwives, they gain weight, and then they have like a like a like a six-pound baby. So they took a lot to nourish that baby.
SPEAKER_01Absolutely. I mean, I was not thinking anything about that. It was just, of course, you can't even say that it's just not a good place to be. I should I'm gonna blame her now for even saying it. But here I was Susie's fault. Yeah, here I was thinking, no big deal. That's what it is. That just happens when you have children. So, anyways, we get down to the car, and I had pulled the car around, and then at this point, you have to put it in the car seat for the first time, which by the way, that means you've got to tell your story about the first car seat. You have to I thought that because I did learn that the hard way. Yeah, you did. Yeah. So we're in in the we're basically have the bat doors of the car open, a little four-door car, and the bat two doors are open. And at that point, she's out of the wheelchair, and we're both trying to put this car seat in, and then the and you have the base and you try to get the thing really, really tight. All the parents out there that have done know what I'm talking about. It's not easy. No. So she happens to be on the side where she's pulling on the seatbelt to tighten it up. Okay. And Dave, that's me, in an effort to try to make lemonade out of lemons. She's she's just mentioned how she does, she's got this extra weight she wants to lose. Great. So I say, Brace yourself.
SPEAKER_00Oh no, oh no, no.
SPEAKER_01I say, well, she's pulling on this thing. I'm like, well, might as well put that extra 40 pounds into it. You should not say that. You did not say that. I said it, but I honestly, in my little pea brain of a man, thought, hey, well, if you have it, let's use it. I mean, let's make lemonade out of lemons here. I actually You should have seen her eyes, though. Oh, I bet. I mean, she's as sweet as they get. And I looked across, I looked across the backseat of that car. I looked up, I probably had a little smile on my face. Like, I'm funny. And she looked at me and she said, Don't you ever say that to me again? And I'm just like, oh.
unknownOh.
SPEAKER_01You're like, what? I I really thought I was making lemonade out of lemons, but you don't don't say that.
SPEAKER_00No, that's uh you definitely learned that the hard way. Very hard way. And I would assume that had you asked, but I mean, why would you think to ask that question to your dad or anybody or another friend who had had children already? You'd think, why would I ask that question? It just happened in the moment, and you're like, oh.
SPEAKER_01I I don't even think I said, oh, when I said it, I thought this is a smart thing to say.
SPEAKER_00This is witty and fun, and we're just gonna, if we got it, let's use it. And all of a sudden you get in the car, you're driving her home, and you're like, geez, pregnancy's really made Susie uptight.
SPEAKER_01No, I don't think I said a word at home.
SPEAKER_00I didn't really think I was supposed to be saying that. Well, that's definitely something that you would learn the hard way. I learned something the hard way along those lines, and I'm glad you brought it to my recollection with the experience that we had when we had our oldest. Now, Kennedy is 11 now, so you know, 11 plus years ago. I almost said, if you will.
SPEAKER_01Oh, we will.
SPEAKER_00So, so join with me. Come back with me 11 years, if you will. Oh, we will. I've got to stop no doing it, stop saying it. Similar type of experience. Heather did great. Again, the miracle of birth. Miracle of birth. And and I was nervous being a first-time dad. I'm sure everybody's nervous being a first-time dad. And I just was anxious about car seats. Because I want to, this is a little tangent, but like I'm the youngest of of three, but growing up, I mean, we never had car seats. No, I don't no, I don't remember. I don't think they were invented. Yeah, no, I mean, those you you just didn't just wasn't necessary. And so and I think they were probably necessary. They're probably necessary, but we just didn't have them. I I remember that my mom had something that looked like a car seat, but it was like a stationary item that has straight back. It would kind of fold down. It was almost like a ride at Lagoon. He's got to come down over your head. But I don't ever remember like securing it to the car. Maybe you were just on the wild mouse the whole time.
SPEAKER_02I hate that ride.
SPEAKER_00That's the worst.
SPEAKER_01For our listeners that are not don't live in this area, wild mouse is the worst ride ever at lagoon.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, Lagoon. They say that's where fun is, but at the Wild Mouse is where fun stops in a hurry. In a hurry, in an awful big hurry. Hate that ride. Maybe we could take the trip on uh the podcast on the road, but and and go on that ride. I digress. So I'm just wanting to be the best dad that I can. Heather was a scheduled C-section, but she actually went into labor the Saturday before. And so we were rushing, and I've always been a little bit of a procrastinator, but I had every intention of going down to our local uh Bear River Health Department to be instructed on the appropriate installation of car seat. It just felt like that's what I should do. Okay. So we're in the buttons too late now. I missed it. But Heather was in the hospital for like three days or four days, so I thought, I'll go down and learn now. This would be a great time. I go down there. This nice girl, she comes out, we go out to my car. She is showing me with a doll about how to install a car seat and how to install more importantly, how to install the baby within the car seat. So she points out a few things, and I put the doll in there and I pull on the strap, and she's like, oh, she's like, and she just kind of rolled her eyes at me and gave a sigh. She's like, pull a little harder. She's like, I don't want to be able to pinch any strap. Like, you've got to have that tight. And there shouldn't be nothing between the baby other and the and the strap of the car seat than a tiny little piece of material. I mean, it was just like she wanted it to be tight. And I says, okay, if you're gonna shame me, I can get it tight. Yeah, I can get it tight. We go up, take Heather, wheel her down as well. I take Kennedy and I put her in her car seat, and the minute I put her in her car seat, she starts to cry. I was like, oh, well, okay, let's get home quickly. Uh we get home and we stay home for the most part. Uh we I remember we ran out to McDonald's to get a coke. I put Kennedy in the car seat, strap ran, instant cry. And I'm like, what is going on with this baby? Like, I thought most people, babies like to go for rides in the cars. That's how you get them to fall asleep for crying out loud. Thankfully, Heather's older sister Jenny flew out the following week to just be with us and kind of help Heather and do a few things. Heather took Jenny with her to, I think it was Kennedy's first well check, I think maybe two weeks or whatnot. I, of course, being the good dad that I am, showed Heather how to install Kennedy into the car seat. So Heather is putting Kennedy in the car seat, and Jenny is looking from afar and she's like, Whoa, what are you doing here? And Heather's like, well, I'm just putting Kennedy in the car seat.
SPEAKER_02And she's like, what?
SPEAKER_00And I can still see the tears just rolling. I mean, I didn't see him. Heather says tears just rolling down Jenny's face. She started to laugh so hard. What I was doing, Dave, is like I was putting basically Kennedy's arms and her legs through the same hole. If you can picture that. Wouldn't that put her legs right over the top of her head? How do you're pliable? Think of this those bones or there's more cartilage the first couple of years. I hope so. But I so and and then after the the nice lady, I shouldn't say that, the nice girl, slightly shameful girl at Barrier Health Department, I shouldn't say that because she's great, but shamed me into pulling them tight. Like I was like, and you gotta you know put your hand on Kennedy's abdomen and just really lean into that strap, put that extra 40 pounds into it. Well, hey, if you got it, use it. Thank goodness, Kennedy. She's 11 years old, she can walk and still, and Jenny's like, that is not right. So I learned that Kennedy learned that the hard way off of my mistake.
SPEAKER_01Well, and then you had another baby and you tried a little, it you got better. Yeah, she's fine. Yeah, she's she's fine.
SPEAKER_00She's gonna be fine. She's got a little bit of a limp.
SPEAKER_01Just a little bit. Nothing they can't fix with a nice pair of shoes.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, the doctor says she'll be out of her braces soon. No time.
SPEAKER_01That's funny. Yeah, yeah. You learn, you know what we learned, and forgive me if I've already shared this on the podcast, but you know how bait kids, and I'm talking toddlers, when they get hurt or they start crying, they they don't take that breath for a long time. You know? And then and then finally they just really lean into the the cry. Yeah. Well, our second child, so my my son, Strafford, he never would he wouldn't take the breath. Oh. So you're holding him and he's getting blue, and he's still getting blue, and he passes out. Are you kidding me? Not kidding at all. Oh, it's the first time it happens, it scares you to death. Of course it does. And this is again public service announcements we've given out. Young parents, your kids could cry themselves to passing out. Oof. And and so the first time I'm holding him and he just I'm like, well, he died. Oh no, he just died. You're like, I'm a horrible parent. Yeah, I just he died. And I had no idea. Yeah. How are you supposed to learn those things? Well, he came too. He finally came to it. It takes a few seconds though, and you're you're scared. And all of a sudden he comes to and then he's just wiped out.
SPEAKER_00Well, there, I tell you what, parenting is not for the faint of heart. No, but neither's being a husband. No. Reminds me. Reminds me. Does this apply? Did I learn this the hard way? I learned this the hard way, but the problem is I didn't think that I was having a problem. But my sweet wife took it upon herself to let me know that what I was doing was wrong. Did she say, Do you know what your problem is? She should have. Because she said it in her heart and in her mind, and when she looked at me in her eyes, she was saying it. Those words came out of my mouth to Susie.
SPEAKER_01And I thought I was just saying, here, I'm just gonna point out what the problem is here. Do you know what your problem is? You should never public service announcement. Don't ever start. Never start a sentence to your spouse with, do you know what your problem is? Do you want to do it? But I didn't know. Well, I mean, nobody ever told me. Yeah, I thought maybe these are things our listeners right now are saying, you shouldn't have to be told that.
SPEAKER_00Well, see, one thing that I didn't think I needed to be told was how to pack and unpack a suitcase.
SPEAKER_01Is there a right way and wrong?
SPEAKER_00Well, there is.
SPEAKER_01Well, apparently.
SPEAKER_00Maybe you better teach me before I run into the same problem. This is actually a little bit of a stretch. I said that because it really has nothing to do with packing or even necessarily unpacking. But Heather and I we got married, we actually did a honeymoon down in Cancun.
SPEAKER_01Right. The whole uh you had an appendicitis scarce.
SPEAKER_00Oh, yeah, you saw you saw the appendicitis scars. Yeah, yeah, we talked about that on the great trip. Cancun was beautiful. And I I don't remember the exact details of this, but it must have been I remember we had a late flight out of Cancun, got to Salt Lake relatively quickly, but oh our flight was delayed a little bit, so we had a little more time in the hotel, so we we took a little dip in the pool. Okay. This is part of the story was I put a wet suit, uh wet swimsuit into my suitcase.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_00Well, but I mean I didn't Did you wrap it in a bag or a towel? I mean maybe. The details elude me at this point. But but but I was thinking correctly, Dave, because we get to Salt Lake, we ride the shuttle out to our car at the time we drove a Tahoe, and so open up the back of it, and I put the suitcase just on the floor. And in my mind, I'm thinking, as I should, I got a really damp swimsuit in that suitcase. Yeah. And even though I know we're only two hours from home, if I can get it out, the sooner the better. Yes. Or we're gonna get black mold growing in there. It's gonna be bad. So I remember I opened up the suitcases in the back and I cracked the whole thing open. And I'm just taking all the clothes that got a little bit of damp, and I'm taking my shorts and I'm throwing them over the back seat of the Tahoe, and then a shirt over the back seat, and then some, but it it was not probably quite as planned out as that, and so Heather probably just thought I was just throwing stuff around. And she she kind of pushes me out of the way, and she's like, No, no, no, no, no, no, that's not what we do. And I stepped back, and Heather was just a Swiss competitive. So it was actually quite forward of her. It was kind of funny. Uh, and I remember sitting back, and I just confessed this to her, oh gosh, maybe a year ago. I stepped back and I thought to myself, Dave, I kid you not, in my mind, I was like, oof, marriage is gonna be a lot harder than I thought it was.
SPEAKER_02And has it been? No.
SPEAKER_00I mean, I just want to get that out. Like it was like, yeah, like and and I learned something, I guess, the hard way. It's like just just do what she says.
SPEAKER_01Just do what she says. Yeah, that I mean, all the old guys out there will say something similar to that. Just yeah, happy wife, happy life, stuff like that. But they don't say smart things sometimes.
SPEAKER_00No, and and that was not my action was not smart. And or even if I thought it was smart, I could have done a little better of like explaining what I was doing. I bet you scoffed. I bet you bet you have geez, I was doing fine. I roll, and everybody knows when you I when you roll your eyes, all that means is I think you're stupid.
SPEAKER_01Yep, exactly. So Susie and I were married and living in a little single wide. Okay. And by the way, loved it. We had so much that was such we had some really close friends that lived just a couple single wives down. Yeah, yeah. And we had some great, great times in that little trailer park. Sure. But and you're better because of it. Well, I feel better because of it. Yeah, you look great. Thank you. I feel pretty good. All because of the trailer park. It was called palatial living, and it was palatial. Yes. We were over with our friends the budges watching a movie one night. It was a weekend, the movie got over, and we had no kids, by the way. Not at this point, no children. There was there was not a care in the world. Okay, so it's but it's getting late, and so it's time to go home. So Susie's ready to go home. And I'm like, well, and and I'm not a gamer, it's not me, never has been. But but Budge had just gotten FIFA 94, 98, or something like that. It had to have been 98. So the soccer game. And and I would be Bulgaria, because that's where I live for a couple years, and he's be South Africa. And we had a lot of fun with that game. But that night we decided, well, you go ahead and go home, Suze. Lori's gonna go to bed, and and Budge and I will just play some video games. Just this game. Seems fair.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I mean, there's nothing else to do. Yeah, like what I mean, like, yeah, I mean, you you got no responsibilities, you know, no kids to put to bed. No, no, no, nothing to do.
SPEAKER_01Nothing. So we played late, and I got home, well, three in the morning. I mean, it was late. Okay.
SPEAKER_00And and just a little preface here, I mean, this is obviously before the time. I don't want to make it sound old, but I assume you didn't have a cell phone. Did you?
SPEAKER_01Um, no, I I probably not. Um, in fact, I remember getting our first cell phone when we had Maya. Okay. And it was kind of one of those block ones. Yeah. In fact, that the the same time I told you on the other story, I almost missed the birth of our child because I thought they the doctor, the nurse said, Oh, she's she's still got a long way to go as far they were just starting to give her Pitocin. Yeah. Do you know that whole process? And so they they thought we'd be there for hours. And I hadn't eaten anything, and so I thought I'm gonna hungry. Yeah, I was gonna go. It she went from a to all the people that understand this, she went from a one to a ten that quick. Okay, so it's really on her. It's a yeah, it's all Susie's fall. And I I almost left. I wouldn't that have been something. Well, it would have been something. I'm just sitting out of the Orange Julius at the mall working on some nachos. Wonder how Susie's doing.
SPEAKER_00I wonder how Susie's doing. These nachos are a little spicy, a little delicious. Oh, I'm a little comfortable. But but the point being is like you couldn't, you know, you're gaming late at night. Like, you couldn't have even just easily sent her a text.
SPEAKER_01No, no, I mean, but she knew where she knows. She knew where you were. So, anyways, I roll in really late, and then the next day she kind of got after me a little bit. And now, if anybody knows Susie and I, we are two peas in a pod. We don't fight. Yeah, we it's just not us. But she goes, She kind of got after me, and these words escaped my mouth. Okay. And even as they're going out, I'm like, I'm not even this dumb to know that this is not true. So this was a weak moment. Yeah. And I don't even have to have older guys say, don't ever say this. Okay. This but this came out of my mouth. It's none of your business what I do on the weekends. Oh no, no, no. She's my wife, man. She's your wife. I I I and as they're going out of my mouth, I'm like,
SPEAKER_00I got a very uh vivid imagination, so which I'm grateful for. And I can just see you maybe opening up the fridge, put out a sunny deep. I'm so basically watching TV. Drinking something real dramatic. Hey, it's really nothing. Don't worry. It's none of your business what I do on the weekends.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. And and it's if anybody knows Susie, she's the sweetest lady ever, but that one got to her. So what was her reaction? First swear word I've ever heard out of her mouth.
SPEAKER_02Okay. Do whatever the baby you wanted her.
SPEAKER_01I think she had a shoe in her in her hand and that came my way.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_01But and and she she stormed off to our bedroom, and it's you know the long haul of the single. So it's quad dramatic. Yeah. So she went to her, and I sat there and I'm like, well, that was a dumb thing to say.
SPEAKER_00So to your credit, you acknowledged it like right away. Oh.
SPEAKER_01I mean, the words weren't even out of my mouth before I thought, well, it is her business. It's her business. It's a little bit of her business. This is really kind of her business here on out. It's her business what I do on the weekends. So needless to say, she knows where I am right now. Um and I said I might be late. So yeah, these are things we gotta. I hope all the young men out there are listening and saying, okay, write that down. It is her business what you do on the weekends.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Uh don't start sentences with, do you know what your problem is? Any of that stuff.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. I think this could definitely fit. I mean, these stories just kind of pop into my head as we talk, and I love this concept. But a thing that I learned the hard way, um, I'm gonna a little spoiler alert, don't be a pansy in front of your grandma. Okay, I learned that the hard way. Because she was probably tougher than you. You for sure. First of all, as as I've said on this podcast many a time, and I've also said this if you know me 10 minutes, you know that I'm one quarter Belgian. Yes. And I it's one of my I mean, I'm proud of that, right? Well, you look great. You knew that was coming, don't you? You sat down on a team. So I a little soft love there. Yeah, so I'm quarter Belgian, which of course would make my beautiful grandmother, my grandma and I. It's my mom's mom. She was from Belgium, and I I'll never forget the time we were in her utility room in their home, and for some reason it had a little bit of a lower ceiling.
SPEAKER_02Mm-hmm.
SPEAKER_00You know, I didn't build the house, but anyways. Well, you're not a small guy. No, I mean, and I, you know. You have to hunker down when you walk around. No, I mean, but I could I could touch the ceiling. Okay. Okay, I could touch the easily easily. And as the story will prove, so could my grandmother. So my mom and me and my grandma and I were sitting in the utility room just kind of talking to something, and I see a spider on the ceiling. Okay. I see a spider on the ceiling. I'm like, oh spider. And my grandmother says to me, she's like, kill it. And I said, Okay, give me a shoe or something. And Dave, I kid you not, I could see her beautiful, dark, dark eyes look at me. And I and it gets a little bit more dramatic every time I tell the story, but I don't even think she looked. She was looking at me right in the eyes. She takes her thumb and she squishes that spider right into the ceiling. And while she does it, she looks at me, she's like, You panty waste. Oh my gosh, your grandma told you a panty waste. I had it coming. You did have it. I had it coming.
SPEAKER_01I had it coming. Okay, but let's let's be honest. Let's say there's a there's a spider right here on this side. I'm not, I'm not. You're gonna stick a thumb on it?
SPEAKER_02It's sick. Me too.
SPEAKER_00It's kind of gross. I don't want to hear it go. But I think she, I mean, it was I think I mean, I think I just set her up for that. And she's like, oh yeah, Jason, here you go. Because she I don't think she would have done that normally. So it's funny. I think she was taking a great moment.
SPEAKER_01We some that generation was not even our parents, that our grandparents' generation, tough people.
SPEAKER_00Well, they call them, I mean, that's the greatest generation. They call them that for a reason. Well, my grandmother was raised in uh uh you know Nazi-occupied Belgium. Wow. Yeah, gotta be tough. She was tough, she was a tough woman, but but without a doubt, one of the kindest people I ever met. But I learned the hard way. Don't challenge your grandma. No, don't challenge her.
SPEAKER_01And she she'll let you know. She's putting a spot. My grandma was grandma loosely was a little little lady, and I remember going into her house one time, and she's little enough where her sons had picked her up and set her on top of the refrigerator so she can't get out. I'm like, grandma, what are you doing up there? Well, somebody help me get down.
SPEAKER_02That's that's like fantastic.
SPEAKER_01So did your grandma speak German or Dutch?
SPEAKER_00She's uh French. French. French, yeah. We all I can say is je m'appelle Jason. That's my name is Jason.
SPEAKER_01I know, because I took one quarter of French in uh ninth grade, got kicked out. Uh what? Probably talking too much. Talking too much in French. Yeah, and you know, Susie took like two years. That's the only thing she can say. I'm like, even I can say that. I took not even a quarter. Yeah, you're like, so that was wasted energy for you.
SPEAKER_00I can say Vash Noir. I think that means black cow. Sounds worse than that. It really does. Yes, oh uh Vash Noir. No, but yeah, that's that's cow.
SPEAKER_01Black cow. Isn't it funny how I know words out of a a bunch of different languages, but only like specific little words. Like Vasuschilaufen. What does that mean? Waterski. You want to go water skiing? I don't know.
SPEAKER_00Vasuschilaufen. What language? German. Oh, of course.
SPEAKER_01Now ask me if I speak German.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, speak German? Just a little bit. Not even. Just a dab. Yeah, dab.
SPEAKER_01I can say Voschuschilaufen.
SPEAKER_00I would give it to Gut Heute. If you're like, I put it on all the applications. German, proficient.
SPEAKER_01I can say rich and poor, and I think I can say der Spritzer, which is the pencil sharpener. Oh, really? The teacher would point around the room and we'd have to come up with the words.
SPEAKER_00We said that spritzer made me think of a beverage. I don't know why. Oh, I'm thirsty. Me too. Um there any other things, I mean, when you actually one thing that I did learn, you touched on this briefly earlier, but you were a kid. When I was in college, I actually thought I was getting ready to go on a cruise with some of my single friends. Yeah. I went to a tanning bed. Okay. I don't, I'm not proud about it.
SPEAKER_01Did you put a little sticker on your hand? And the little bunny ears. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. You probably did. So that it made it, yeah. Kind of hide that appendix scar. Yeah. I've I've I've done the I've never done a spray tan, though. But I've been in a in a tanning bed.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, so you lay down, put little goggles on.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, put the little goggles on. Five minutes, man, and I am crispy critters.
SPEAKER_00You're like, Dave, is well done.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, well done. This this is this is this skin is not meant for a or bed. But you see guys that have suspicious tans. Suspicious.
SPEAKER_00Like suspicious meaning like it's January.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, and they are, you know, nice and broad. Suspiciously tan. Suspiciously tan. Where is that coming from?
SPEAKER_00Yeah, and and for reasons that maybe only our individual neighborhood could understand. You're like, well, how do you know? It's like, what if it's just like a farmer's tan? But I'm like, well, it was January, and uh he was he was supporting, he was bare chested.
SPEAKER_01Yes, and that shouldn't be either. We had a plot about that one. Oh, we didn't. Grown men should not take their shirts off. No, but but it's funny when you do. Oh, so funny. In fact, let's let the people behind the curtains just a little. Jason just had to call his wife down here. Look, he's not No offense. Okay, I think you take it. No offense. You're not so technic IT no. You're not an IT guy.
SPEAKER_00No, I mean anybody that knows Heather and I knows that they have to do it. She takes care of it. She takes care of that.
SPEAKER_01So we were struggling getting this stuff going, the software going for the pod, so he calls her down, and yeah, my mind just I said, well, we should probably take our shirts off. Yeah, just for fun. Just for fun. So she walks in, and there's two guys trying to lay down a pod with her shirt. Shirts off. And I just tried to act casual, act cool. That's the best way to do it. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Just like that's how we always do it. Yeah. Oh, we actually, yeah, we record all of our pods on shirtless. Which we do not. We don't do that. Uh any other things the hard way? I mean, I'm sure there's like gonna be a lot of yeah, and then we'll probably come with that. We'll come back. We'll circle back, we'll circle the wagons. But we're we're 30 minutes into this. Hopefully, well, I again I don't want this to sound you know haughty or anything like that, but it's like thank you. I I hope we've maybe shared, you know, just a little bit of of knowledge that could perhaps could help the young husband, the young father.
SPEAKER_01I've always thought somebody needs to tell new parents that your kid could pass out, yeah, and you won't won't know. And there's also night tremors. Have you heard of those? Night terrors? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, that might be for another day, but those are not fun either.
SPEAKER_00Enough, and they're real. Yeah. But if I could, if I could sum up our podcast with just two bits of just two pearls of wisdom. Pearls of wisdom. Young husbands out there, never, never tell your sweet wife to put that extra 40 pounds into it.
SPEAKER_01Oh. And I'll and please. It is her business what you do on the weekend. Thanks again, folks, for listening to another episode of the Small Town Podcast. We're pretty sure we've changed your life for the better. If not, well, we'll try again next time.