Small Towns Podcast
Small Towns Podcast
E 50: Ailments
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Ailments. The guys are not well (mainly Jason). They are both well into their 40’s… closer to 50 than 40 actually. They (mainly Jason) are not aging well. From bad feet to rashes where nobody wants rashes, to needing to rub Mentholatum basically everywhere… They (again, mainly Jason) go into great detail of their ailments… Except Dave… Dave has a cold. That’s it. Dave seems to be ailment free. Jason is falling apart.
Note: We “thought” we were recording this episode for our YouTube channel. Jason forgot to press the record button. Head on over there to view a brief confessional. Next time for sure!
Welcome millions upon millions, perhaps billions, of faithful podcast listeners. We are your hosts, Jason Kimber and Dave Simmons. We'll bring you along with us as we share life stories from our experiences living in small towns, or in Jason's case, an unincorporated community.
SPEAKER_00That's true. Along with genius suggestions for solving world problems and a whole lot of last. This is the Small Towns Podcast. Hello again, one and all to the Small Towns Podcast. I'm Dave Simmons and joined by Jason Kimber. And Jason, we got some big news for our listeners today. Super exciting news. Super exciting. This is next level, buddy. Next level. Well, let's just get right into it. Um, folks, we have uh the exciting announcement is that we've partnered with Utah Public Radio, and we couldn't be more excited. More appreciative. Absolutely. They're a fantastic organization. Yeah, the idea is here that hopefully we can get more listeners to us through Utah Public Radio are um right on their right on their main website, upr.org. If you were Jason's on his computer right now, just slow scrolling down, and if you scroll down just a little bit on the right side of the screen, I'm sure it'll change over time. But right there, small towns with Jason and Dave, right on the website.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, and if you actually click on it, I mean it's obviously a clickable link, click on our on our cover art there, and it'll take you uh to where you can see a list of every single podcast, every podcast that we have done. In fact, I think you mentioned earlier this is number 50. 50. Yeah. Which you were gonna say you should get me a present. Yeah, you should have actually should have got me something. Oh, I thought you were saying you'd get me something. Exactly. Uh my size is Disney Cruise.
SPEAKER_00Um, the other cool thing is if you have your phone, which most of us do and you don't carry your laptop around, on the phone, if you just type into your web browser there, upr.org, same sort of deal. Obviously, the format's a little different for the mobile site, but as you scroll down, it's a little bit further on the scroll, but you can find the uh Small Towns podcast right on there. Again, it's kind of a hopefully we're scratching their back and they're scratching ours, and we'll bring listenership to our uh podcast, and then we'll send some listenership to them. But you guys, if you go to upr.org, there's a lot of really cool stuff on there, a lot of good content. Yeah, um we're back, it's been a little while, we've been uh dealing with some stuff.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, it's been busy. Um and it feels a little bit like riding a bike, you know, you just for you get behind the mic and you're ready to go. But I tell you what, I feel like I'm a little rusty.
SPEAKER_00Well, you don't look rusty. All I know is this. When now you've got us on the YouTubes. By the way, I like to call it the YouTubes like your mom used to call it the Walmarts. Yeah, Walmarts. Now that we're on the YouTubes, I it feels like we need like hair and makeup.
SPEAKER_01In fact, I should have put a nicer shirt on. I feel like last time we wore black, and now look at us. We didn't even color coordinate it. I feel like this is kind of a rusty a little bit color coordinated.
SPEAKER_00I don't think it really goes with my hair. I have to match my hair to my clothes. Did you know that? Well, you look fantastic. Well, I don't feel great. There's there's certain things I wear, and I'm like, eh, it's not my favorite, but it's gonna have to do it.
SPEAKER_01You look fantastic. Well, and and with the um with the YouTubes and the camera, I never know. I'm like, do I look at the camera? And now all of a sudden I gotta see the camera on the camera.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I don't we don't know if we're supposed to be looking at the camera or each other. We're gonna so we're gonna do a little both. But but yeah, with uh I don't I can't I I mean hair and makeup would probably be better for us. Yeah, for sure. Um, from a pleasing thing for our listeners, our viewers now, but um I you know I can't do makeup. I'm no you can't do makeup. I can do chapstick, I'm a firm believer in chapstick. Oh, you know. But do you feel like that? That's like am I one step away from totally embracing makeup on my face if I enjoy chapstick? Kind of.
SPEAKER_01I actually referred to chapstick as lipstick the other day, and I feel sheepish about that. You should feel sheepish about it. Yeah, I said heads, could you pass me my lip ball? Stick. What do you think about mentholatum? I don't mentholatum. Oh, is that did you rub that? Well Is it like baby John Brown had a something, rubbed it with mentholatum oil? It's a it's a it's a solemn. Is it a solemn? Yeah.
SPEAKER_00See, I grew up with my mom still to this day, and I didn't find out till recently that my sisters and me both like that stuff is awesome. Like on my lips and right around my nose, and it clears you out. Like I'd bathe in the stuff if it was okay. I don't think it's okay. I don't think it is either, but it's the same stuff, it's the same idea as VIX that people put on their chests and you rub it on the bottom of your feet. Have you ever done that? Well, just recently.
SPEAKER_01Want to get into the ailments I've been suffering from? Um I do, I do want to get into the ailments. I mean, first of all, you've got, if you can see here, you've got some ultimate little. I'm so sick of these. Yeah, but you have been in a bad spot.
SPEAKER_00I have been. I thought, well, I've got the black lung.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, I think for sure.
SPEAKER_00But then when I did a little research, I'm like, well, I haven't really been doing any coal mining lately. No. And I can't remember the last time I smoked anything except for meat. But uh so I'm thinking it wasn't that, and I finally went to the doctor. I'm like, this is ridiculous. Yeah, yeah, you had to. And I think I was I had multiple, like a string of things, uh-huh, and the last of which was bronchitis. And that I mean, that was not good. Yeah. So I put some Susie has some stuff called Wintercrest.
SPEAKER_01I was gonna I was gonna ask you about that as we're talking about ailments. Isn't it like some sort of magic potion? Well, she thinks it is.
SPEAKER_00It's like it's like the guy on um what's the movie where the guy used a um Windex for everything?
SPEAKER_01Uh Greek wedding.
SPEAKER_00Great, Greek wedding. Yeah, Susie uses uses that winter crest, and she just so she put some on my chest like a mother. Yeah, of course. And you know, of course what happened? Yeah. I rashed up. I got a rash. And then Jenny, our good friend Jenny, goes, you need to put it on your feet. So I put it on my feet. Next thing you know, my feet are peeling.
SPEAKER_01Oh, I don't I don't like I listen, I'm not gonna because I don't know, but like I understand maybe a little right here, you know, maybe clear up, but to me it's clearing up the airways, like you're you're breathing it in, basically. Yeah, I do not understand the feet. Now I listen, if it works, I'll try it. Don't get me wrong, but did it did I mean, short of the peeling of the feet, did you feel better? I'm still coughing. Well, you have had, I mean, you're still coughing, but there were, and correct me if I'm wrong, there were like there was like a period of two, three weeks. Did you like miss two weeks of work?
SPEAKER_00No, a week of work. I was it was rough for a while there. Yeah, but um, I didn't ever miss any. I missed, I did take a couple of sick days, and then the other days I couldn't be in offices, so I'm trying to work remotely and talk to my customers the best way I could, but I couldn't actually speak. Oh so it was all email, yeah, it was all stuff like that, and these dang cough drops. I'm gonna keep it quiet though, please through our uh through our pod here. You open one up, you're like yeah, it's like the sound of the mac and cheese when I like to stir mac and cheese and it goes. So I'm gonna keep this really in the back of the back of the mouth, and hopefully nobody knows. Well, they're gonna know. Um by the way, you can't make me laugh hard. No, I got to go. Because it will trigger a real heavy cough.
SPEAKER_01I don't there's not gonna be a lot of laughing today, I think, because you know, these these podcasts go whatever direction they go, but um my thoughts are this uh we reach a certain age, and I think this goes for everybody, where certain, if I may use the word ailments, ailments, yeah, they start to kind of creep in. Yeah, they creep in, you're mid-40s, you're not you're not mid-20s anymore. You know, I can't pound a double cheese at midnight and expect to sleep okay. Oh, I tried that the other day. Yeah, didn't work. It doesn't stop me from trying, it doesn't stop me from doing we're not we're quitters. We're quitters, but I'm miserable after.
SPEAKER_00That's right. So we know it's coming. I got I mean, I got a lot of ailments, particularly just recently. Well, what are we doing in our lives to avoid these, make these ailments not happen? I mean, they're happening. They are happening. But I'm not kicking them as quickly as I would have as a younger man.
SPEAKER_01And I I almost think I'm living a life that invites the ailment.
SPEAKER_00I am too.
SPEAKER_01It's like I'm like, here I am, black lung, see what you can do. Yes, and it's like I live such a lot of no not left. Sedentary. Or or pedantic. No, what's pedantic mean? I don't know, but I've had words.
SPEAKER_00Sedentary.
SPEAKER_01Sedentary's probably it. That's I think that's right. Such a lifestyle that, like, not only am I not aggressively running away from these ailments, I almost sit and welcome them to me. We're definitely not running. Oh gosh, no.
SPEAKER_00We're not running anywhere. I've got to do something. I gotta have a lifestyle change. Me too. Of the of epic proportions. You've mentioned lately that you try to stretch out.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, oh listen, we're gonna get into that. We're gonna get into that because like I think it is it has been a game changer for me. I need to see these stretches.
SPEAKER_00Okay, well, we'll get I'm we have a camera, we can get into that. Yeah, but I've tried to stretch recently. Well, full disclosure, yeah, I don't want to stretch myself. I want somebody else to stretch me.
SPEAKER_01Is that I mean is that ultimately, I also, as the saying goes, I would like a solid gold toilet, but it's just not in the cards. Well, I've got a twelve 13-year-old son who I've roped into it over the last few years ago.
SPEAKER_00Oh, and okay, that's good then. That's good. Susie won't do it. She just went up and says, no. Well, stretch your own dang self.
SPEAKER_01In this situation, like, this the way that I stretch, uh, it would have to be Heather, because like, first of all, it happens like uh the very first thing before I even get out of bed. I wake up, my alarm goes off at 6 30 a.m. And before I even before I even get out of bed, I go through a series of stretches. I just I need I need I mean it's probably a breach of your privacy, but I'd love to see this morning thing go so it's uh it's a it as we all know, and all of our listeners and now our watchers, uh, that's the great thing about YouTube. I'm gonna show you. Well, well, you can show me, but let's paint the picture first. You wake up, okay, you haven't even gotten out of bed yet. No, no. And I mean, if we want to go back before that, like, um, I don't like I yeah, I just woke up, but let's not forget about the two or three times that I've woken up in the middle of the night already to go to the bathroom.
SPEAKER_00Well, you are a mid-40-year-old man. Mid-40-old man. Um, to all those younger men out there, it's coming for you. It's coming for you. You're gonna be up in the night going to the bathroom. Yeah, absolutely, absolutely.
SPEAKER_01Sorry. Um, and that's that's I'm just gonna write some notes here. Um multiple times. Multiple times, and so, but I would wake up every morning, Dave, and and I I'm not even kidding. Like, I I wouldn't even have done anything the night before. Like, nothing, like like just a normal day, and then I lay prone and fall asleep for eight hours, and I wake up and I feel as if my body has been ran through the ringer, like everything hurts, and so I get out of bed and I'm like, oh ouch, and then you slowly walk and your knees crack and your ankles crack, and you just slowly make it to the bathroom, and it's just a painful experience. It's a painful experience. So I was uh I think I was just scrolling through some reels on Instagram that they get me, they just suck me down, it's like a rabbit hole. Yeah, they do. I can't help you. They have your algorithms. There we do, and there was one guy, I'm sure he's an influencer of some sort, and he's he's saying, You gotta start every morning with these stretches. Takes like maybe a minute tops. I can get on more than a minute. Yeah, well, it's me too, and I'm like, bull, you know what I mean? Like these are gonna do a difference. Uh, I started doing them, and I do them every morning, Dave. Every morning.
SPEAKER_00So is this gonna turn into a public service announcement? Yeah, because if you show me something here today that I can implement into my personal life and not invite all these ailments into my system, it helps. It helps. I'm gonna need that help.
SPEAKER_01It's more of a baby step thing because like I got a lot of other elements and I'd like to get into some of those as well that I don't think in no matter, no amount of stretching is gonna help some of those ones.
SPEAKER_00I I'm an angry stretcher. So Ollie's been like pushing on things and stuff, and I scream and I yell, and then I say, hold that, and then I count to just a couple, and I'm like, okay, let it go.
SPEAKER_01I'm not doing that because the whole house is still asleep, but I'm definitely, without even meaning to, I'm definitely letting out some of Oh yeah. Yeah, that's me too.
SPEAKER_02You know, just like mine's more of a uh Yeah, it's not good.
SPEAKER_00You I mean, let's are you ready? Am I qualified to run this camera? I think so. I don't guys we don't know we're doing it. We're gonna try our for our listeners. Yeah, you describe. Okay, I'm gonna try to get this closer. Yeah, you describe it. And we're gonna try to describe this what what we're seeing to our uh audio listeners as Jason. Well, we don't have a lot of work or room to work with here.
SPEAKER_01We haven't now it's interesting in in times past, I'm gonna kind of back in here. In times past, you guys will remember audio listeners like we did like we did a like a description of like Dave shooting the duck and a few things. So this is better because we can actually see it.
SPEAKER_00Right. So we're gonna try to do this here for you folks. Yeah. I hope I'm gonna hold something here. Wouldn't that be bad? Well, I while I'm stretching. Yeah, okay. I hope I look okay. You look fantastic. Okay. Are you getting yeah? It's good, it's good. We got to, we got to. Okay. So Jason is now laying on his back in our little studio. Yeah. And he's really not got a lot of room to work with. In fact, no. In your mind's eye, just picture him laying on a twin bed. Yeah, yeah. That's all he's got right now.
SPEAKER_01Exactly. It's like uh I got a nice, beautiful pillow. We get we can talk about pillows because a bad pillow caused me all sorts of ailments. But, anyways, so I wake up and before I even get out of bed, it's yeah, I start with the left leg first. First thing I do, pull into the chest.
SPEAKER_00Lifting it to his chest. Pull it to the chest. Okay, it's a good foot from your chest. That's okay, we understand.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, when we say pull it to the chest, it's just not possible. Floor to the chest without my uh belly getting in the way.
SPEAKER_00Hey, by the way, this can don't be cracking anything off in here. Uh because we are in a small room.
SPEAKER_01I'm not good thing the window's open because I'm gonna tell you every morning without question.
SPEAKER_00You sound like a tugboat. All I know is what you're doing right now, it's like a billow. So you're basically trying to create. You gotta do it, you gotta do it. Yeah, okay, here we go.
SPEAKER_01No, and then again, while I'm pulling this and holding this, my right foot, I'm flexing it. I'm flexing it. Okay. Get some of that. And then I go through a process. Usually go uh across, pull. Oh! Try to keep that left shoulder down. I'm trying, but and it feels so good, it's got like a good, like good stretch here. I think Ollie do that one to me too. Come back to center. Okay. Now, one thing that I do, I I mean, I hope this doesn't get um just picture me doing this like in my sleep attire. Okay. I don't we don't we don't want to do that. We don't want to do that because now I'm gonna I feel like I'm gonna be like There's no way those underpants are like I'm gonna be opening up the world here. Then I then I gotta pull it this way. Yeah, I gotta pull it this way.
SPEAKER_00Okay. Okay. He is for all of us just listening in an audio. That is that is opened himself up to the world. Like a like a like a flower. Like a lotus flower. A lotus flower. Okay, sorry. Then I go then I go straight up. I go straight up. That's straight up as a stretch. What I'd like to see you do here is straighten that knee up. No, I mean, that's as good as it gets, but it gets up. Straighten it out. I mean that's it. That's I mean, I'm gonna pull a hammy. No, I'm gonna get that straight for you. Okay. Okay, here we go.
SPEAKER_01I'm a little nervous about like if something happens, we're just gonna Okay.
SPEAKER_00You are not flexing the blue. No, that until then come back.
SPEAKER_01No, you just do right leg, flexing the left, flexing my left toe.
SPEAKER_00Okay, so we've just reversed the process.
SPEAKER_01Just reverse it.
SPEAKER_00We're going over here. Okay. That's a good stretcher. This is my favorite one.
SPEAKER_01Because we're here, we're here, we're a little bit in the back. He's working the glue. Opening up back this one.
SPEAKER_00Lotus flower too, right? Uh do not come over here because this is worse than my left one, I think. Like it's straight. Okay, that's a right angle. That isn't even that isn't even close to even a f uh uh what's I mean here. I feel like I got like there's no way that's 180.
SPEAKER_01No, no. And then and and then and then I do one of these. Like I just do baby. I can't. I mean, that's a happy baby.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I can't do that. And then I just you know kick my feet over to the side of the bed. By the way, I don't call happy baby happy baby, I call it gassy daddy. Oh, well, that's for sure. Gassy daddy. Are you done?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, I think that's it, but I'm gonna skip. Like, well, you gotta go that way. Okay, I okay.
SPEAKER_00We're gonna do that.
SPEAKER_01I mean it's a small studio. But you don't want me like getting right up close with the camera, you know what I mean?
SPEAKER_00Well, we're gonna just come here to the bad place so that I can know.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, kind of get us back where we were. Back where we were. And I think everything looks good. Oh, can you go up a little bit, get the edge of that table?
SPEAKER_00How about that?
SPEAKER_01That looks great. It's good. You think it's good, it's good, it's good. Okay, okay, and then you do that when you come back around.
SPEAKER_00Okay, I think you'll be fine. Well, folks, I think we might have uh changed some lives today. You know, we all now know, first of all, how Jason is stretching in the mornings in your underpants.
SPEAKER_01But I kid you not, Dave. I kid you not. Like that is a game changer. I want you to try it tomorrow morning.
SPEAKER_00I'll I'll do that. Yeah, I do it at night time, some very similar things to what you're doing, and I'm not gonna lie, I do a little more than that. Do you really? Yeah, I'm I'm downward dogging. Oh, well, that's too much. That's way too much.
SPEAKER_01I mean, particularly well, I mean for 6 30 in the morning.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I'm I'm an I'm an angry morning guy. Yeah. I I mean I wish I was one of those guys that got up and thought, oh, it's a beautiful morning, and off we go. Me too, but I don't those people ridiculous.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, it's silly. But do you ache when you wake up in the morning or is it just me?
SPEAKER_00Um Yeah. I mean, yeah. Yeah. I'm just more angry about the fact that I gotta even get up. I'd rather just lay there and sit. Um, you uh you got any ailments? Well, beyond beyond the just the the lung stuff. Because I'm a mess. I'm coming through. I'm coming through. I mean, I You look great. Well I mean you're a good friend. I I switched razor blades again like recently. I mean, I hope it's not coming through. At about five o'clock, I got a five o'clock shadow.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_00And look like Teen Wolf by six. Me too, actually.
SPEAKER_01Um I think it might be the the concept of entering my inter forty my uh my mid-40s because I feel like I've kind of been falling apart. Now I have um my sweet niece, her name is Abby Abigail. Okay. She just graduated, or actually, she's graduating like I have a niece named Abby. You do?
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Seemed to be a popular name back there. Delightful. Yeah. She's graduated from PA school. And so she's always kind of been like our uh, you know, a resident doctor. Yeah. Now I love Abby with all my heart, but but sometimes I remind her that like uh her bedside manner could could use a little help.
SPEAKER_00Well, hopefully she's not look, my bedside manner to my own children is not what how I would. I mean, I should treat my own children a little bit better, but usually it's like you're fine, yeah, get up.
SPEAKER_01Well, I mean, because I've had all sorts of ailments over the years that I've actually asked her about, and she'll be like, just walk through the pain. And I'm like, no, that's not what I want to hear. Like it, like everything is hurt. Like I had a I had a I had a mole removed off the bottom of my foot. Whoa. Yeah. I didn't know you could get moles on the bottom of your foot. I had it my whole life. My whole life I had it. Really? And this has been a couple years ago now, and my doctor was like, oh, we've got to get that cut out. My good night, I swear he almost was like tickling the top of my foot. Really? That's deep. Oh, way deep. He you sure it wasn't a wart? No, it was a mole. It was a flat mole. It was like a brown wart's mole's ugly cousin. I don't know who's worse. I well, I mean, I think they get nervous for moles for like, you know, cancerous type of stuff. Oh, right. But it'd been the same size, anyways. Doctor cut that sucker out, but it I it hurt for a couple of weeks. And Abby's medical advice was just to walk through the pain.
SPEAKER_00You just toughen it up. Toughen it up. Since my kids have been little, when they get hurt, I just tell them, just they could tell you right now if they say what's Dave gonna say next. They'll he'll just say, Love the pain. Just just embrace the pain, just like it. When I hit each of my boys in the face with a baseball, first of all, it wasn't my fault. Put your glove in the right spot. Exactly. That's on them. That's on them. Yeah. If we get hit in the face, I just like to say, just love the pain. It's not gonna get any worse than that. You did it. Congratulations.
SPEAKER_01Okay, I mean, maybe I'm gonna have to call you, have keep you like kind of like on standby because like um let's see, I'm gonna start at the well, I started with the bottom of my foot with the with the mole, but that's been a couple years ago. Yeah, I'm fine, that's healed up. Okay, good. That's fine. My left heel. No, you're fine. My left heel, though, I think it's got some sort of like um maybe Achilles tendinitis. Your left foot? My left, like my left heel. Yeah, maybe that's why you couldn't stretch it out. That's why I couldn't stretch it out so bad. Like, hurt so bad walk. So, like, I'm like putting like that moleskin tape up on it, trying to do all the things, hurting forever. Let's see, so we had a bad left heel, and then we're just going up. We're just going up in the body. And then I'm your knees. You got good knees? Uh my knees seem to be fine. In your hips? Hips are fine until you start favoring how you're walking on your left heel, and then then you're gonna throw that out. Yeah, you're a mess. I'm right hand. What? Arthritis, some fierce. How old am I? 68. Maybe. I mean this finger right here, look at that. Look at that. Look at that, guys. It's like turning in. It is turning in, guys. It's weird. And my middle, my my middle finger here, I mean, like it it is just swollen, hurting, like arthritis is so bad. I I even I got this magic bracelet. Does it work? I don't think so. Not so hard. It's like it's like copper, so it kind of turns your skin green there a little bit, and it's also magnetic. And I think both of those magical powers are supposed to fix it. Well it's not working.
SPEAKER_00Isn't isn't if stuff's turning your skin green, doesn't it just mean it's low quality metal? No, no, no, no. I think I mean it's copper.
SPEAKER_01I mean, those old CTR rings would turn your finger green. I mean, not in the way we're talking about. This is copper, buddy. Copper, if you have a copper bracelet, turns it green. Buddy, check check me, fact-check that.
SPEAKER_00Hey, I'm gonna believe you. Yeah, because I don't really want to do the work. I have to fact check it.
SPEAKER_01And I think it's supposed to be magical, but I wear it. Um I finally went to the doctor about it and he gave me some. I basically like strong ibuprofen. I think it's like anti-inflammatory, which probably I should be able to control diet, but I I could you share that with me? Uh no, because I love the double cheese. Oh the the medicine or the double cheese? I mean the medicine. Oh, the medicine, yeah, because I need that. I can get my own double cheese.
SPEAKER_00But if I can get an extra little dose of ibuprofen from you, that'd be nice. I said that. You know what we do is we like to, if we happen to make our way to Mexico, oh yeah. Just get some ibuprofeno. It's a little stronger.
SPEAKER_01It's the best they pronounce it? Yeah, ibuprofino. Okay. It's good stuff. Well, I'm gonna give you some because it's so funny. Like, I all of a sudden I said to Hitler, I'm like, oh, I feel so much better. Is it is it the magical tape that's you know, the mole skin to to uh manipulate the Achilles Hill, you know, to take the pressure off of it? Is it my magic bracelet? Is it that magical um what did you call that? Ibuprofino. Yeah, well no, but the stuff that Susie, the the Oh, the the winter she's like subscription. Winter crest. Winter crest. Like my mom used to have something called like blue. It's like some sort of essential oil, you know, rub on there. And it's like that's probably just the ibuprofen, like the strong ibuprofen, so it feels better. Yeah. So I do feel, but I don't I mean I don't take it every day, but I'm a mess. I'm hoping to get better. Um, I do feel like I need to make some changes because I don't think you're supposed to take that stuff every day for a while. Oh, I don't know either. I feel like I take too much ibuprofen.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I think it's bad for your kidneys. Kidneys? I don't even know. I don't either. I don't know. All I know is we're going, Susie and I are gonna go down to Mexico in a couple of months. Yeah. And uh probably pick up some ibuprofen. Give me some ipoprofession. I went down to La Ranchetta here in town to see if they had something, like a little pharmacy in the shop. No, they don't get ibuprofeno there.
SPEAKER_01Well, listen, maybe I'll send you down to the script. Well, maybe just give me some just float me whatever you got there. Well, and you know, you were actually kind of you remind me a little bit of of my dad in that regard because and I think I've talked about this on the pod before, but my dad had a famous phrase. Um, and and he would say it all the time, and more often than not, he was 100% right. But uh he'd say, Well, we'll just see if you get hurt, he and he'd say, We'll see how it looks in the morning. Yeah. And you had a broken arm one time. I did have a I had a broken uh yeah, I had a broken thumb, I had a broken f calf, like I broke my one of the bones, tibia fibia, what are those? Is that is that the foot? I mean that's the shin. That's the shin and the shin, yeah. I broke it the shin. One of those. I don't know which one. I don't either. Uh jumped off of my front porch on a pogo stick. Well, that's smart. Oh, I thought it was awesome. You didn't land it though. Heard the crack. No, really. Heard the crack. And my dad, famous. We're gonna say it was.
SPEAKER_00It looked horrible. Dad, I heard it cracking. Yeah, it's going in the wrong angle.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, exactly. That's probably wrong. All of a sudden I got a boat sticking on. I'm like, I mean, that's gonna look horrible in the morning, Dad. It's gonna look worse than it does now. But I mean, nine out of I just almost made a statistic up there, but you know, most of the time his advice was good.
SPEAKER_00So we've moved up your body we're now to your torso.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_00How are you feeling? I don't know, from the uh from the uh, you know, the uh bosom up.
SPEAKER_01The bosom up not to bypass the guts. Oh you're drinking a lot of orange juice?
SPEAKER_00No. My dad always says, I like orange juice, but orange juice doesn't like me. I need some of that stuff at all.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, it's gonna be bad. A kidney stone, I've had a kidney stone, been a long time, knock on the wood. I don't ever want another one. No, we've talked about that on the pot though.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, or worse than most things.
SPEAKER_01Uh but I do have, as we as we you mentioned bosom. Yeah, it gets worse, dude. It gets worse. I'm not quite sure.
SPEAKER_00How do are you gonna get graphic on this pot?
SPEAKER_01We have I'm not we are not getting into the explicit. No, no, no, no, no. We're not gonna put an E on our pot ever. Ever. This is a family show. Okay, uh, but I'm gonna ask you a question. Okay. Can can I can I say nipple? Maybe we're stick with Ariola.
SPEAKER_00Okay. I don't know.
SPEAKER_01I think you can just hang it. Okay, yeah, okay. I think so. I think so. Because because I I mean I have them. You two of them. Exactly. I think there's only two. Maybe two. Well, no, that no, that oh let me tell you, there, but I've had a problem. You're an open person. I am an open manager. Most people don't want to talk about these kinds of things. Yeah, but maybe but you're trying to help the world. I'm trying to help the world, and quite frankly, if one of our listeners said, Hey, I suffered from that as well, this is what I did. Because this is this is a problem that is not solved yet, my friend. Maybe a month ago, maybe more. Left, I I feel like I'm gonna smile and snicker every time I say the word nipple. Well, most people do. Yeah, okay, so I'm gonna try it, but anyways, maybe we make up all new word for nipsky. Left nipsky. My left nipski itches, just itches something fierce. Okay, and but there's nothing like you would think. Is there a rash? Is there is there is there something going on? You got some of that, what's that skin disease you got going on? Maybe some melanoma, carcinoma, some kind of gnomon? I don't think there's any gnomas in there, but like you know, I don't it just but nothing. It's gonna start with an epidemic. Epididymus or whatever. Epidurymus. You know, we should go to PA school. We really should, or some school. But I mean, so I'm always itching it, and I'm like, Heather's like, you gotta go get that checked on. So I did go to the doctor, I had to get a new doctor because my old doctor retired.
SPEAKER_00Did you go to Heather and say, What do you think of this? And is that when she kind of looked like, whoa, you gotta get that looked at?
SPEAKER_01No, she just was always seeing me itching it. Okay, but but the because the thing was there it there was nothing You're just walking around the house. Yeah, but nothing looked different at all. You know, if I'd itch it, it'd get red, but I mean it wasn't, you know. Sure. Sure, you'd be sure it would. Sure. And so finally I said, I'm gonna go to the doctor, I'm gonna ask about my heel, I'm gonna ask about my hand, and I'm gonna ask about my itchy uh left nipple. Nibsky. Nibsky. Nibsky Russia, and we worked through all the issues, and then he said, and brand new doctor, I'd never met him before. Great guy, and I think he's gonna be our family doctor now. And he said, Um, well, he's like, Does it does it look? Does it rash? I'm like, no, he's like, okay, I don't need to see it. Fair enough. Nothing to see, I can tell. He gave me this powerful cream to rub on it. Dave. I he said three times a day, but I I didn't do that, I just did it maybe once or twice, and it worked worked wonders. No itch. No itch. But I kid you not, buddy. This is a long story. I'm sorry, I'm getting around to it. I'm taking my youngest Kate down to cheer practice. Maybe a maybe a week ago. Just a week ago. And I'm driving down there, and all of a sudden I'm like, ouch, ouch, ouch. And I and I'm driving, and so Kate's and you know, passenger. I don't want to make a big deal out of it, but I'm like, trying to pull your shirt away. Pull my shirt away because it is on fire. Oh, that was probably that was probably hot. It was on fire. I got to the chair camp, let Kate out. Do you start itching at that point? No, you don't want to touch it. No, no, no. I mean, I anything was just killing so bad. So I drove home like this, you know, left hand holding out on right hand on the wheel, and just like, what is happening? Walk straight in the house, walk straight into Heather and I's bathroom, uh, take off my shirt, and I'm like the Suvius. Oh my goodness. Was it big? It was big, and I'm like, Head, you gotta come look at this. I don't mean to be, I made her look.
SPEAKER_00Did she say I don't really want it?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, but I said you have to. Like you married me. This is marital for better or for worse. Sickness and health, exactly. And right now, my Levnipski is like twice the size, and David is like it's like bright white. That's not normal. No, I'm looking at the right one to compare it to. It's fine. It's a good hue. It's a good hue, fine. Just you know, I'm I'm I'm you know, kind of tan, you know what I mean? This is like burning on fire. Well, what did you do? I I just well, I I thought maybe a nice warm compress. You know, maybe that would be ah no, bad. Bad bad bad. Uh I just took my shirt off and I went and laid down in my bed. I did get a heat pad on it because I was googling everything, you know, and it suggested the warm compress, but it was just it was just too ouchy. And so I just put the heat pad on it, and it's eventually subsided. Um and had you just put it on the lotion or cream? No, no, that's just it. Because I think maybe that has something to do with it, but but it had been a couple of years. I mean, it's like a couple of days of days, at least, maybe three or four. Well, you probably need to go get it looked at again. The problem is, is like if you look at it right now and I'm not gonna show it. I mean, I'll show you my stretches, but I ain't yeah, you know, come on. It was a family show. Yeah, yeah. Come on. Nobody wants to see it. Sick. But but I think what I am gonna do next time, I'm gonna take a picture of it. I mean, because what I because I can't just I guarantee I'm gonna see that, aren't I? You will see it. Yeah, I mean, I don't really have a choice. I'm gonna send it to the the thread group.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, that's sometimes folks all of a sudden we see a uh a text come through for Jason Kimber, and we're like, look, if it's from Jason and the kids have your phone or whatever, just pass the phone over. Let's check it out first.
SPEAKER_01It's the and usually if if it's something like that, I'll give you a warning. I'll be like, Clear the line. Clear the line. Yeah, is this a secure line? Is this a secure line?
SPEAKER_00Yeah, we've had some things come through. I have not seen a picture of your Nipsky Russell yet, but you're going, well, I know you're going to.
SPEAKER_01Just kind of plan on it. Um, it hurts so bad. Um, other ailments, I do think other than that, I am doing pretty good. Oh, you know what made me think about it? You know how we're talking about chapstick. Yeah. For some reason, and I don't know why. So maybe this is another ailment. Like my mouth, I feel like it's like cotton mouth, you know what I mean? Like so dry, my lips. I don't ever, I hardly ever wear chapstick, but now, the past two weeks, I have not been able to leave the house without this stuff. Now, Heather makes fun of me. I want to show it to you. Yeah. Uh Heather makes fun of me because Oh, that's nice. Well, I've had this before. Have you? Yeah. It's so nice. Nice. Heather makes fun of me because she thinks it's a little um Does it make give you a color? Well, it's not a color, but it's like it's like it's it's orange mango blast. Does she think it's feminine? She thinks it's yeah, a little girly. But as long as it doesn't make your lips turn a different color. Not at all. Not at all. I'm okay with it. But I did call it um lipstick the other day. Um, well, I didn't mean to, I just slipped out. But I remember hearing this joke one time about an old farmer that you know, he says, he's like, you want to clear those chapp lips. He's like, you just reach down, get a little chicken poop, rub them on your lips. He's like, how's that gonna work, grandpa? Whatever. He's like, well, I mean, I'm not gonna say it's work, but it's gonna stop you from licking your lips. And he's absolutely right. Yeah, you know, I probably I mean that that's like a joke. I missed the punchline, but you you you get it. Um I do think I got some issues. I was sitting at work just today, my watch goes off, and it says, uh, alert alert, and I was I was sitting at work dave, and it said, uh, your heartbeat is like too high.
SPEAKER_00You were just sitting there? I'm just sitting there doing nothing.
SPEAKER_01Well, I mean How does your heartbeat get too high? I don't know. It was super hot, I mean it was super hot in my office. I don't you know how you've been in my office. Yeah, it is a warm office. It's like a freaking uh inside of the oven, which which uh big guys like me don't do well in the heat. Well, it's hot up there. Yeah, so I don't that was the first time I I generally do not have with all my ailments, one of those is generally not high blood pressure.
SPEAKER_00So well, I hope that's not the next step because we've kind of worked from your foot all the way up to your bosom. Now the next is you're getting hot head, it's trouble.
SPEAKER_01I don't know, but um other than that, are you you're feeling other than that? I feel great. I feel correct. Yeah, I I take like probably like six pills every morning. Most of those are just vitamins. Do you take a uh multivitamin? Uh I do. Well, actually, I don't take a multivitamin, like a Centrum Silver or something like that. Because of the age. But I do take vitamin D and I take vitamin B12. I don't want to, I I just take one.
SPEAKER_00What do you take? Man vitamin. Is it a Flintstone? No, but that I could get on board with a Flintstone and a Scooby snack to chase it down. I mine's just a men's multivitamin. I got it at the Sam's Club. I figure it's gonna have some stuff in it.
SPEAKER_01I maybe I should just try that because I take, I say take B12, I take uh vitamin D, I take my um uh acid reflux over the counter, just like uh generic for prepised or whatever. Um seems like you got a lot going on. Oh, I also take an allergy pill. I take one of those once a day. Yeah. I I I just if I don't, I pay the price. Yeah, me too. And not and not every day, but enough, I gotta stay on top of it.
SPEAKER_00So do you have soft water here in the house? Yeah, very much so. Do you? No, we should. You should. That's something I've that's kind of on the list of things we probably need to do. Yeah, you need to get that. But I wondered if if if you were dealing with hard water, maybe that's what was bothering your skin.
SPEAKER_01Very well could be. I've thought about that, like maybe different uh detergent detergent or whatnot. But why wouldn't it bother the rest of your exactly? Just one, it's just unless my left nipski is like I don't know what you got going on there.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, exactly. It looks fine, it looks fine. Um I haven't seen it, and I'm gonna trust you on that. We'll have some updates later. Yeah, well, don't post those to the gram. No, I won't, I promise. If you can't help it. I promise. Sometimes you can't.
SPEAKER_01But I will ask this. I'll ask the I'll ask our listeners like if anybody has struggled from any of these things. This Satanized affliction that you've suffered from.
SPEAKER_00Please, please let me know. If if you're dealing with ailments like Jason is, then you're in a world of hurt, but at least you know how to do a nice stretch out in the morning. And now I do too. I would like a report on the stretch. I will return and I will report. Have a good evening. Thanks again, folks, for listening to another episode of the Small Towns Podcast. We're pretty sure we've changed your life for the better. If not, well, we'll try again next time.